Slowing Down for the Health of it…

Dear Lord, I invite you to invade my life today. I desire to be with you. I want my life to be worth your sacrifice on the cross. I know that everything I bring to you is “filthy tags”, but my hope is that my best to you is acceptable and seen as a gift from my heart. Thank you for your sacrifice Lord Jesus. I see your sanctification working within me. Keep my eyes, ears and heart attentive to your Holy Spirit. Lord, what’s on my heart today is the unknown of another child that you’ve blessed Kim and I with. I know you live me more than I can know this side of heaven. This precious gift of my fourth child amazes me and scares me all at the same time. I ask for a double portion of faith in you Lord. You are a kind a loving Father. Lord, I have to be honest, it’s hard to slow down because I believe others will see that as lazy or uncaring. That fear brings a potential roadblock that could be a stumbling block for others. If I’m perceived as not being present more often than not, then my fear is that my work allergic will be seen as being on cruise control. No one has ever communicated this to me directly, but they are just being nice. I have heard, “that’s not what we called you here to do.” in the same breath, I have been challenged during a Council meeting about what I am supposed to be doing. I believe I am making inroads with FLPD families, but I’m not sure others understand that this doesn’t just happen overnight. Sometimes I think it’s all about the numbers…how many are in church on a given Sunday…how many students are in youth group…how much money is being spent on things, etc. To some (minor) degree they are right, but a deep relationship centered on Christ has way more unmeasurable value in God’s eyes than if we gained another warm blooded body this Sunday. Lord I ask for your peace in these matters. Things like this shake my sense of calling. Some say that I would make a great pastor an others are counting sheep for me. I’m not sure that investing in additional seminary education will change things for me as I’ve seen it in my pastor in my first call as I see it now with Pastor Olson. I love to learn, but I believe my time can be better spent in other areas of education.